December 2011
560 posts
Taking a couple days off of tumblr now. Got some real life to attend to. No one is allowed to unfollow me while I’m gone
now that I'm reminded of it
donotcallmeashley:
Let’s talk about how chris is kind of the worst.
C: hey baby it’s dark and quiet and we’re about to go to sleep let me tell you a scary story
Me: no way I hate scary stories
C: but it’s not even very scary! And I’m here to protect you!
Me: no way I hate scary stories
C: it’ll be fine!
Me: no way I hate scary stories
C: /tells scary story directly in my ear and then...
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Maybe the shirt should just say FUCK FAT CHICKS. Then when fat girls come up to me I can explain it’s actively promoting fucking fat chicks. Then they will have awesome sex with me and everybody wins.
Do you guys think there’d be a market for a shirt that says “FUCK FAT CHICKS! Seriously it can be pretty amazing, maybe you should try it”?
No one ever asks me anything. I just get anonymous... →
Penny and the Quarters - You and Me
Dear Memphis tumblrs,
alleygaga:
mellysays:
-bobella-:
Where should I eat for my birthday dinner on New Years Eve?
The Majestic Grille all the way and FOREVER.
TEXAS DE BRAZIL BIRTHDAY EMAIL LISTTTTTTTT!
Jasmine has awesome thai. India Palace is the best indian. Edo on summer is incredible japanese. I’m too cool to eat american food
gay male: i'm gay
straight female: OMG UR GAY LET'S BE BFFS CAN WE GO SHOPPING TOGETHER OMG
gay female: i'm gay
straight female: EW GET AWAY FROM ME U DYKE DONT TOUCH ME GROSS LESBIAN GERMS
And let's not forget -
Gay female: I'm gay
Straight male: OMG SO HOT. DAMN. CAN I FUCK YOU AND YOUR GIRLFRIEND WHILE SOMEONE FILMS IT. TOUCH HER BOOOBS. BOOOOOOOOBS.
Gay male: I'm gay
Straight male: HOLY SHIT IT'S A HOMO GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME FUCKIN HOMO. BACKS AGAINST THE WALL GUYS.
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just discovered my new favorite superstition. Apparently it’s a minorly popular belief that birthmarks on your body are where you were killed in a past life. I think i have one under my hair on my head. Moom headshot! Do y’all have any good birthmarks?
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hey it’s finally cool to hate Lana Del ray. I have been hating Lizzy Grant (LDR) for months now!
http://blogs.villagevoice.com/music/2011/12/worst_songs_2011_lana_del_rey_video_games.php
and for those who don’t read hipster runoff
http://hipsterrunoff.com/altreport/2011/09/lana-del-rey-exposed-b4-she-was-alt-she-was-failed-mnstrm-artist-without-fake-lips.html